Shit.

With so much crap in my life right now i dont even know what way is up anymore.
I am having so many problems with everything its not even funny.
OK so my bf of 10 months broke upp with me (Kolby), then the next day asked me
to take him back, then broke up with me again that night. Likle seriously hat the hell.
I dont even know why he would mess with me like that.
And his "best friend" is hitting on me (Jesse ross), the day of both break ups. And he doesnt even try to hide it. I hate this kid, even as a friend. And this
morning he came early, (becuase i am always here by six thirty) to hang
out with me. He gave me a pack of smokes and doesnt even get the hint
to go away. so while im all pissy about my loser ex (Kolby, even though i love him so much, i cant stand what he is doing to me) playing with my
heart he (jesse) is trying to pick up the pieces and im going to kick his ass.
all of our mutual smoke pit friends (Austin, James and Cole) think he is pathetic and saved me from him this morning. but he doesnt seem to get the hint. and it is just soooo
annoying. what the hell am i suppossed to do?
I dont even know.
And i dont want a new boyfriend. Because part of me still wants to be with kolby.
But he really is turning into an ass.
And it sucks because i am in love with him.
He is my first true love. and i am going to spend my life comparing every other guy to him.
And now i have spare and so does jesse and im going to be stuck hanging out with him, and its all so lame.
but i am hgoing to reconnect with all my friends and rediscover the fire that makes me who i am because i became so docil with kolby and have no fight or fire and put up with everything he dished out.
well to hell with that. im not the victim of a break up i am breaking free from it and im going to spend spring break with all my amazing friends, (Ashley Tat Austin James Ashley Ryan Deziree and maybe if the jerk is lucky Kolby, who by the way broke four bones in his foot and is on crutches and going to get fat. muahahahahahaha.)