I wish I knew

I wish I knew what to do from here.
I wish I could just understand.
I wish I could be half normal.
I wish I wasn't so afrid to just say yes sometimes.
I wish I wasn't so afriad that I won't ever live up to my potentital.
Which is weird because I can still hear one of my fourth grade teachers telling me I was one of her low potential students.
Along with my friend Megan, and look where she is now.
Dropped out coke head, like her mother.
And you should have seen her.
Shes absolutley stunning.
And she was so talented, a born leader, who even at age 9 had the abilitiy to draw better than most people three times her age.
All of it thrown away.
I am so confused about life, and love.
I'm sure someday down the road, it will make sense.
But for right now, I think I need to climb under a rock.